Bah Humbug
by Jen the Genie
Summary: Madness, pure unerdulterated whimsical madness!
1. Default Chapter Title

Title:Bah Humbug! pt1  
Author: Jen the Genie  
Contact; Purpledragon17@hotmail.com  
Archive: Make my day - just let me know where so I can come visit.  
Category: MSR/fantasy/humour (I think)  
Rating: PG13 for the odd bit of Language-always like to err on the side of caution.  
Spoilers: Yep! More than you can poke a stick at and not just from Xfiles - have fun.  
Summary; Madness, pure unadulterated Whimsical madness! *G*  
  
Disclaimer: Don't own any of 'em, past present or Future. I'm just indulging a whimsical inclination and therefore making no monies what so ever. Any mean-minded entity wanting to sue should direct all legal documentation to my therapist. *G*.  
  
Notes: So I'm a teensy-weensy bit out with my timing on this, but who cares? It's the thought that counts.   
Look on this a very early posting for Christmas Future *G*  
  
Here's hoping you all had a good one and may the New Year be peaceful, healthy and bountiful to you all and may your muses' all be working overtime.  
  
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Basement Office  
Dec 24th - sometime around 6pm  
  
The Spirit of Christmas was alive and well and living in the the dark and dusty basement of The J Edgar Hoover building in Washington DC - NOT!  
  
The season of peace and goodwill to all was never a welcome guest in the eyes of Fox Mulder and judging from the way drawers were being banged, paperwork slammed and curses issued then this year spectacularly so.   
  
Of course the mercurial temperament of the man was something of a legend in the hallowed halls of the FBI's finest. But those who had had the pleasure, or discomfort, of being on the receiving end of it had noticed a marked settling in the guy in recent years. An active, if not always accurate, office grapevine had had much to say on the subject and all those who had partaken of even the most minor slivers of gossip had come to the same conclusion, it was the influence of his partner, Dana Scully that had instigated this.   
  
The fact that the mercury currently appeared to be raging off the scale pointed to only one thing - Agent Scully had gone home for the holidays and she and Mulder had not parted on good terms!  
  
  
  
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Basement Office   
24th Dec- Sometime after lunch  
  
"Have yourself a merry little Christmas, make the yuletide gay..." Hummed Dana Scully as she sealed down the edge of the wrapping paper then reached for the gift tag. "Next year all our troubles will be far away." With a wry smile she noted that gift label was almost larger than her purchase. She signed it with an accomplished flourish, then attached it carefully to the small parcel.  
  
Her last minute shopping trip had gone extemely well even if she did say so herself. And it wasn't a case of being disorganised...more a case of being comfounded by what exactly to buy her partner and best friend. Inspiration and fate however, were apparantly feeling sympathetic toward her plight at this 11th hour, because as she was preparing to give up and head back to the office defeated, she had spotted it. The ideal gift.  
  
"I thought you were going early today?...Oh Dammit!" Mulder cursed as the armfull of files he was struggling with began to spill through the doorway ahead of him.  
With his briefcase and top coat tucked under the opposite arm and his knee propping open the door, he fought to contain the remainder. But it was a battle he was destined to lose despite his manic juggling. As the files began to cascade to the floor, the breeze they incited caught the neat column of their companions teetering in the pending tray at the edge of Scully's table dragging them into the choas.  
  
"I am...Oh Mulder! I've only just finished sorting those..."  
  
"Don't!" Mulder held his now free hand up in exasperation, "Don't say a word." Tossing his belongings in the general direction of his desk, he stooped to gather up the escapees'. "Whoever said that this is the season of goodwill has obviously never tried to negotiate a highway or a shopping mall lately."  
  
"You went shopping? I would have paid to see that!" And incredulous Scully quickly slid the gift she'd been attending to into her briefcase. Dropping to a crouch on the opposite side of the melee she began to pull the papers into some semblance of order. "Can I assume from that remark that the *magic* of the season has bypassed you?"  
  
"Magic? Magic?...The only magic I can imagine at the moment involves wax dolls and hatpins!" Mulder heaved the tower of files upward "And I'll bet you five bucks the doll's got my name on it." Two quick, fluid strides and he was able to dump his burden on the desk.  
  
"Oh c'mon Mulder, shopping for presents aside even you have to acknowledge there is something magical about this time of year. The lights, the Christmas trees, the carols, the happy smiling faces...."  
  
"The way a months salary can disappear overnight...yeah! I'd say that was pretty magical!" Mulder noted peevishly. "Come January and half the population of the North Western hemisphere will be seeing red on their bank balance....you included Scully, if those bags you keep bringing back each lunch hour are anything to go by!" He sank wearily into his chair and began to boot-up his computor. "Almost makes me glad I'm colour blind."  
  
"Ah! Is that what your wonderfull mood boils down to...hard cash or the lack therof?" Scully crossed to the coffee pot and poured two cups.   
  
"My bank balance isn't the point in issue thank you.... I just thought that Christmas meant more to most people than a rabid shopping trip..."  
  
"Or work?" Scully supressed a smirk. Wasn't this the man who continued, despite all offers to the contrary, to spend what the rest of the world considered the festive season at home with a bowl of cereal and some pretty suspect videos for company? "You know Mulder, even Scrooge took one day off..." she teased as she went to pass his cup.  
  
"And that's how you see me is it? As the FBI's answer to Ebenezer?" He rounded on her irritably "Well that's choice isn't it....If that's the case then at least I can look forward to some company between now and Christmas Day!" Even as the words came from his mouth Mulder began to regret them. He saw Scully's back straighten defensively and her previously amused expression dissolve into badly disguised hurt.   
"NO!...no that's not how I....."  
  
"But that's what you were you implying!" Even the large neon sign in his head screaming 'Emmergency - engage brain before putting mouth into gear!' wasn't enough to stop that gem escaping.  
  
"I'll give my mother your usual apologies Mulder....." Grabbing her overcoat and bag Scully turned her back on him and strode purposefully to the door.  
  
"Scully...Scully wait up!" Mulder started to scramble to his feet as she reached the threshold. "Scully please! I'm sorry...I shouldn't have said that...Please tell your mother I appreciate the offer but..."  
  
Scully paused, her hand resting on the door jam, her foot tapping out her agitation on the tiles just beyond its boundary."Bah Humbug!" She tossed a seering look over her shoulder then marched off in the direction of the elevator.  
  
The elevator doors were on the verge closing as Mulder plunged his foot between them. As they sprang apart Scully reached across and punched the 'close' button repeatedly until he positioned himself between her and the control panel. With a snort she stepped back and folded her arms. "Haven't you got ghosts to entertain?" she muttered icily  
  
"Scully I'm sorry, I was way out of line.."  
  
"Sorry? Sorry? Why on earth would you be sorry Mulder?" She bit her lip to curb the sparkle of angry tears that were forming "I know how difficult you find the holidays, but I really thought that this year you'd change your mind and join us...Is the prospect of Christmas with me and my family really that bad?"  
  
"Never," Mulder shifted uncomfortably  
"But as welcome as your mother makes me feel I doubt I'd be so warmly received by your brother......"  
  
"Oh grow up!" Scully reached across and hit the panel of buttons again. "Is this really about him? I couldn't give a damn what Bill thinks and neither should you.... but this is what you do best isn't it? Bury yourself in your work, use it as an excuse to avoid what you can't deal with. Maybe you should use your self imposed holiday exile to re-read *A Christmas Carol* Mulder! You might find it enlightening...even Scrooge figures it out in the end." The brief flash of fire in her bright blue eyes faded suddenly to sadness "I've got to go....if you need me you know where to find me."  
  
"I'm sorry Scully....you have a Merry Christmas."  
  
Mulder turned on his heels and walked back to the office, the weight of her condemnation almost more than he could bare. As the door slammed shut he removed what was left of his pride, folded it carefully, laid it in the bottom draw of his desk and kicked it shut. 'If only you knew how right you are Scully...' he thought bitterly 'Christmas -Bah Humbug indeed.'  
  
  
part 1 concluded.....  
  
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	2. Default Chapter Title

Title:Bah Humbug! pt 2  
Author: Jen the Genie  
For disclaimers/notes see pt 1  
  
Apartment 42  
Hegal Place  
Dec 24th - 10.30pm approx.  
  
The static swirl that danced across the face of the tv cast a monochomatic glow around the apartment. Mulder was stretched out on the couch, his mind suitably numbed with a couple of beers he'd found in the fridge and half a bottle of a more than reasonable Tequila - an early Christmas present from the indomitable Frohike. The accompanying tag had read 'Drink-me' in large purple letters. Well drink he certainly had, hoping it would shrink him Alice-like to the size he felt mentally and then he could find the door that would allow him to escape from this self induced seasonal blue funk. It didn't and he couldn't, but it did allow him to fall asleep.  
  
Was it the heavy knocking on his apartment door that stirred his alcohol induced slumber?...or the fact his sweatshirt had ridden up to expose his bare back to the cold night air? Whatever the reason, Mulder became aware of a presence in the room that his dulled brain couldn't immediately identify but sent shivers up his spine none the less. A waft of adrenaline coursed through him as he struggled to pull his body from it's prone position, feeling rather than seeing the figure lounging comfortably in the armchair opposite.  
  
"Take your time Comrade." The Russian inflection in the final word focussed Mulder's fuzzy brain quicker than a bucket of iced water.   
  
"Alex Krycek!" He spat, groping wildly for his gun. *D'oh!* A large figurative hand slapped the inside of his temple as he quickly recalled leaving it on the nightstand. "What the hell do you want?"  
  
"Relax Mulder," Krycek gave a lazy grin "I'm not here to kill you....see, no gun!" As his arch nemesis peeled back the edges of his jacket, Mulder felt the hair on the back of his neck stiffen. He could swear that the figure opposite him was opaque to the point of being see-through.   
  
"No Mulder, this is more a business call. I thought I'd drop by, have a chat, offer you some advice...." Alex began to float gently to his feet.   
  
Somewhere in the back of his mind Mulder heard a noise that sounded suspiciously like his jaw hitting the floor. The figure of Alex Krycek came to rest a good three inches above the laquered wood, a pile of chains neatly coiled at his feet.  
"Social call?...Social call?" he heard himself repeat dumbly  
  
Alex rolled his eyes, "Oh jeez!...Hello? Ratboy calling Mulder!" An opalescent hand reached across as if to knock on the dumbfounded Agents head, only to pass straight through it. What felt like a shard of ice surfed down Mulders spine causing him to shudder.  
  
"You're dead...you're a ghost!" Mulder spluttered.  
  
"Could be!" Krycek shrugged  
  
"No. you're not dead, I'm dead drunk." Mulders eyes flicked questionably between the half emptied bottle of Tequila and Krycek. "You're not really dead...are you?"   
  
Krycek folded his arms, his fingers drumming out silent impatience on an ethereally glowing sleeve.  
"Yes, alright I'm dead. That make you feel any better?"  
  
With chains clanking dimly as they trailed behind, Krycek resumed gliding back and forth above the floor allowing this piece of information to sink in. He knew it had hit the spot when Mulders face broke into a broad grin.  
  
"We'll wadday'know, " Mulder slurred "It must be Christmas! Who do I have to thank for this gift?"  
  
"Irrelevant under the circumstances. As weird as it may sound Mulder, I may have information that could change your life, not for the first time I might add...you interested?"  
  
"Given your track record I sincerely doubt that!" Mulder muttered as he considered his options for a minute then shrugged "Sure, why not."  
  
"Good 'cause I'm nearly outta time here." Krycek became serious "Y'know Mulder for a smart guy you can be supremely dense at times."  
  
"Unlike the dead guy who's currently floating above my floor." Mulder noted sarcastically "Enlighten me by all means Krycek but don't patronise me. I think I'm beginning to figure this out."  
  
"It's nice to see that expensive Oxford education isn't going rusty in the basement." Krycek was equally sarcastic.  
  
"You're an alcohol induced, Dickensian inspired manifestation of my latest guilt trip....What I can't quite figure is why my brain chose you to represent Jacob Marley?"  
  
"Alcohol induced? Dickensian inspired?" Krycek shook his head "Look Mulder, as it stands I couldn't give a rat's ass if you thought I was a marijuana induced manifestation of Bob Marley, do you want to know?"  
  
"What I want to know is why You?....Why you, why me, why now?"  
  
"Does it really matter?" Krycek stopped gliding and lean't forward. " C'mon Mulder, get with the programme here will'ya! All I need is a simple yes or no?"  
  
"I s'pose...but tell me. If this is my personal Christmas Carol nightmare, just what kind of enlightenment am I supposed to reach?" Mulder was bemused.   
  
"Beats the hell outta me?" Krycek shrugged "Still," he straightened his jacket "As you're aware of Dickens then you'll know the drill, so I'll keep this brief...between now and Christmas morning you'll get the customary three visits, past, present, future yadda yadda yadda! But I warn you Mulder, they've updated the procedure since Marley retired so your spirits may not be quite what you were expecting."  
  
"Whatever!" Mulder reached for the Tequila again "Aren't you supposed to lecture me about the perils of my lifestyle or something?"  
  
"Hey, I'm just the messenger." Alex laughed over his shoulder as he floated to the door, "Besides, you wouldn't believe me anyhow." his figure began to fade into the wood. "I'm not party to what the *three* have in store for you but you'd better take heed Mulder. If you don't could be joining me sooner than you think. ...see you on the flip side, the flip side, the flip side........."  
  
  
Mulders eyes lurched from the door to the bottle in his hand and back again. Jeez, this stuff is strong! ..Strong but good... The room began to spin as he collapsed back into the couch. Spirit of Christmas past eh?...Well bring it on! 'Ol Spooky is just dying to meet you!  
  
  
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"Fox?" A warm feminine voice purred in his ear "Oh Foxy foxy fox!" A warm flush of breath slid up his neck causing him to stir, his free arm wrapping instinctively around the warm curves of the body draped over his.  
  
"Fox Mulder, are you going to wake up or am I going to kick your backside!" As the clipped British pronunciation weedled it's way into his brain like a stilleto blade, Mulder came too with a start.   
  
"Phoebe? Phoebe Green?" Something akin to an iceball landed in his stomach. Cautiously he opened first one eye, then the other. It was Phoebe alright. The cascade of brunette curls, the sultry come-to-bed eyes, a cleavage like the Grand Canyon at Sunset....She was just how he remembered her from University. Stop: Rewind: Replay: University?   
  
Mulder was on his feet before you could say New York Knicks. The young woman looked stunned as she thrown unceremoniously to the floor.   
  
"Well I must say, is that any way to treat an old friend?" Phoebe's likeness reached up with an elegantly manicured hand. "Are you going to stand there with your mouth hanging open like a moron or would you care to help me up!"  
  
"Are you a ghost?" Mulder grasped the offered hand "I mean are you dead?"  
  
"Good God no!" Phoebes laugh tinkled around the apartment like rusty sleigh bells as she climbed to her feet. "I'm your representation of Christmas past." she gave a quick twirl "Like it?"  
  
"Ummm...well..." his stomach clenched as a fountain of memories sprang forth "It's certainly different...ummm...err, unexpected?"  
  
"Oh bugger! Don't tell me Alex was less than forthcoming in his explanation!" Her brow furrowed. "Typical Krycek, always messing with the rule book. Anyway, regardless of my little Russian imp's interpretation of protocol, I have a job to do. So Fox Mulder, are we ready to explore the past?" Her smile was reminiscent of that of shark just before it bit you on the ass.  
  
"Where are we going?"  
  
"To solve a three pipe problem, think you're up to it Watson?" Her cat-like eyes challenged him. "C'mon Fox, isn't this what you live for? Delving into the unknown in search of the *truth*?"  
  
Mulder felt his pulse quicken. Phoebe Green, in whatever guise, had the ability to reduce his carefully constructed emotional walls to the consistancy of wet cardboard. Hoping that the passage of time and experience had better equiped him to deal with this seemingly malevolent incarnation, he studied his guest. "Ok,I'll buy that. How does this work?"   
  
Phoebe batted her eyelashes coyly. "Forgive the melodramatics darling, but you have to kiss me."  
  
Mulder winced. "I'd rather walk through fire!"  
  
"Wimp!" Phoebe laughed "Chicken! Y'know I never thought I'd see the day when you turned down a Phoebe challenge. What's the matter Mulder? Afraid you couldn't handle it?"  
  
He was up close and personal in two strides. Long arms grabbed her roughly and tightly closed lips captured her grinning mouth in painfull defiance. Apartment 42 began to twist into a kaleidescope of colour as the magic began it's descent into the past. When Mulder surfaced for air the instantly recognisable scene before him was like a knife between the shoulder blades.  
  
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"Last Christmas I gave you my heart, the very next day you gave it away. This year, to save me from tears, I'll give it to someone special."   
  
The whining falsetto of George Michael immediately confirmed Mulder's worst fears. It had to be the University Christmas ball of 1985. Oh shit! Why this year in particular? He turned to question his guide but the maleficent spirit seemed to have vanished.  
  
The dining hall of Magdalene College was packed with Christmas revellers. Couples smooched in the darkness as the last few songs of the night blared from the disco. As Mulder propped up the student bar, a pint of *Theakstons Old Puke* clutched firmly to his chest, he spotted his reflection in one of the long mirrors behind the row of optics in front of him. A much younger version of himself he noted nostalgically taking in the floppy hair, the sleeves of his suit jacket pushed up to the elbow and the thin, leather,*Piano key* tie knotted casually at half mast. Eww, very Miami Vice! Did I really used to dress like that?   
  
Turning back to the dance floor he began to search through half glazed eyes for the love of his life among the swaying throng. Love of his life? Mulder drained the foul brew from his glass more by bad habit than design as he tried to recall what had been the foundation for that particular strand of warped logic. Emotional ineptitude? The unexpected attention of a good-looking intelligent female? A surfeit of underused hormones? A potent mixture of all three? All he knew for certain was that their six month courtship of snogging and fumbling had culminated in a misty night of embarrasingly quick, but unbridled passion atop a certain tomb in Whindlesham not so many months ago.  
Given his lack of any real experience in the dating department to that point, was it any wonder he had thought it *the real deal?*.  
  
"PHOEBE!" Mulder rested his empty pint on the bar and lurched toward the dance floor. "PHOEBE GREEN WHERE ARE YOU?" He bounced among the swaying couples like a badly directed pinball. He almost collapsed against the opposite wall before he felt the reassuring hands of Roger, his room mate, on his shoulders.  
  
"She's not here Fox me old mate." There was something in Roger's tone that belied pity. "C'mon old son, I think you and I need to call it a night."  
  
"I'm not going anywhere 'till I find her." Even eight sails to the wind but with total recall of the unfolding scenario, Mulder had neither the impetus or the inclination to conceed defeat. He was trapped in his past. A prisoner of particular moment in series of events that he would rather forget. He could do nothing but go through the motions.  
  
"Let her go mate!" Roger tried valiantly to steer his pal to the door. "She's a slapper! A scrubber! Bloody hell Fox, how you got tangled in her web I'll never know?"  
  
"She's my destiny." Incoherant limbs fought the change of direction while his brain fought to control the unwanted words tumbling from his lips. "I love her."  
  
"Jesus went to Bethleham on a bicycle!" Roger, equally inebriated, had a sudden compulsion to educate his roomy. "Look mate, I don't want to be the one to open your eyes but..." He hung his head, almost ashamed of his grasp of the facts. "Fox, you're my mate, my buddy don't make me do this to you...I mean it is Christmas an' all."  
  
Mulder felt the bilious memory trail through his soul. "What are you saying Rog?"  
  
"She brings a whole new deffinition to the phase *goodwill to all men*. What I'm saying mate is that you've been played for a patsy... a fall guy....she's been stringing you along Mulder." Roger wouldn't meet the young mans seering gaze. "I know you won't believe me...hell, I almost hope you don't believe me."  
  
"You're right I don't. You're just jealous that she loves me."  
  
"Yeah right! I suppose calling you *That big-nosed Yanky Hick* behind your back is just a term of endearment?" It pained Roger to resort to the cruel-to-be-kind tact but he was desperate.   
  
"You're a Fucking liar!" Mulder growled menacingly. The temperature of the conversation dropped quickly below freezing. "Either you tell me where she is or I'll damn well knock it out of you."   
  
Roger shook his head sadly. "C'mon mate, trust me, you don't want to know. We'll go back, grab a coffee, sleep it off. In the morning this will all be forgotten."  
  
"WHERE IS SHE?" Mulder's fists clenched and for a minute he was afraid he might actually carry through his drunken threat. Roger sighed the sigh of a defeated man.  
  
"If you really must know, then I suggest you take a quick walk around the car park and find Charlie's car...it's the Silver Porshe." With a pitying shrug the young man began to stagger back to the bar. Halfway there he stopped and turned. "Mulder, don't do it mate please,...don't put yourself through this, come'an have a another drink with me... please?"  
  
The warning was wasted on thin air as Mulder strode purposefully to the door. The barren chill of the English December night probably made his teeth chatter as he made his way across the carpark, but he could recall only what his mind let him. Memories of a past that he thought he'd buried crushed his present self like an avalanche as he felt the crunch of gravel beneath the automatic steps of his feet.   
  
The silver Porche rocked with a stready, rythmic sway as he approached. Each leaden, gut wrenching step took him nearer to the car. His brain fought wildly against the long known *truth* he was about to re-live again, but he continued anyway. The windows, dripping with the steamy evidence of his hearts betrayal veiled his view but the gutteral moans of abandon from within painted a clear picture.  
  
"STOP!" The haunting spell which had trapped him was suddenly broken by the spirit of Phoebe as she barred his path. "Do you really want to go through this again Fox?"  
  
"No thanks! I got the message loud and clear the first time." Mulder mentally scrapped up the tattered remnants of his naive misguided heart and dropped them casually into his top pocket. "What's next? A trip to suicide point so you can push me off and finish the job properly?"  
  
"Mine is not to question why!" Phoebe linked her arm in his and led him away "I can only assume that there is a purpose to what you're being shown."  
  
"That was one hell of a Christmas present you gave me that year you sadistic bitch..." Mulder disentangled himself from her touch with as much distain as he could muster "You really screwed with my perception of the Christmas spirit when you pulled that stunt..."  
  
"You hated Christmas long before I got to you as I recall."  
  
"When I fell for you I started to believe that maybe, just maybe, I was wrong and Christmas did have a meaning." Mulder cut her off sourly. "To you it was all a game, just like this...Well I'm tired of your games, they're boring me. I want to go back! Take me back...NOW!"  
  
"As you wish." Phoebe batted her eyelashes again and they were back in his apartment. "Mulder, for what it's worth I'm truelly sorry for betraying you that night."  
  
"Sorry?" Mulder slumped on his couch and thrust his aching soul into his hands "You don't know the meaning of the word. I thought you loved me Phoebe, I really did. But I was just an amusing distraction wasn't I?" he sighed "After that night I swore I'd never let another woman get close enough to do that to me again."  
  
"So what about Diana?"  
  
"A testament of my innability to keep to my own rules I guess." Mulder snickered bitterly "I seem to have a weakness for intelligent women....actually cold, two-faced, scheming, heartless, intelligent bitches is more accurate....must be the pretty packaging."  
  
"Dana Scully is an intelligent woman."  
  
"What's that supposed to mean? Scully is my partner, my friend...something you never were. She doesn't play games and she'd never knowingly hurt me. I trust her and I hope she trusts me."  
  
"You trust her yet you didn't accept her invitation?"  
  
"Yes, especially because she trusts me. My Christmas's are already ruined, why ruin hers as well? look, haven't you got some other poor shmuck to torment tonight? Like I said you're becoming tedious."  
  
"You know Mulder, you're one in a million. I never really appreciated what I had back then and I'll always regret it... If I could turn back the clock and change it all, believe me I would." Phoebe moved in front of him and placed an icy hand on his shoulder "Fox, maybe by re-living the past you're being given the chance to appreciate what you have in the present?" She leant down and planted a cold kiss on the crown of his head. "I don't blame you for thinking the worse of me but I beg you, don't waste this experience. Don't walk away from tonight with nothing, you're too good a man for that.....Good luck!"   
  
The static swirl of the tv flared for just an instance and the Ghost of Chrismas Past dissolved into the night.  
Mulder took a deep, cleansing breath. Whatever purpose had been in that visit was stangely lost on him at present. The whole thing had left him far too raw to think. All he felt he could hope for was that the Spirit of Christmas Present would be more benevolent.  
  
part 2 concluded..............   
  
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	3. Default Chapter Title

Title:Bah Humbug! pt3  
Author: Jen the Genie  
Disclaimer/notes: see pt1  
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Apartment 42, Hegal Place.  
24th Dec 11pm approx  
  
"Hello Fox...Fox I know you can hear me. I promise this isn't one of your nightmares....Fox I really need you're attention for a minute." The voice of Diana Fowley slid snake-like across the room and into his head.  
With subdued effort Mulder pulled himself into his body.  
  
"Oh Hi Diana. Not a nightmare eh? Then what are you doing here?" The nonchalance in his tone defied his inner turmoil. "I assume you're my Spirit of Christmas present...So what joys have you got instore for me?"  
  
"Always did have a flare for the dramatic, eh Fox?" Diana's cool hand reached and smoothed his brow. "Have I really been reduced to just another of your nightmares?"  
  
"Forgive me If I seem less than indulgent but the events of this evening seemed to have dampened my usual sparkling wit." Mulder straightened himself, the sting of his last encounter still smarting. "I'd appreceaite it if you'd keep this brief and to the point."  
  
"I know, believe me I know." Diana smiled a tired smile. "I deliberately kept you as my last visit of the night..I've had to show quite a few people the error of their ways."  
  
"Don't tell me you've had an attack of conscience?" Mulder couldn't help but smirk. "Told anyone that smoking is bad for their health?"  
  
"Some people are beyond redemption." Diana perched on the edge of the couch."Do you ever wonder if we could have made things work between us?"  
  
"You were the one who filed for the divorce, remember?" Mulder flexed his aching psyche "Sometimes you have to let something go to see if it really was yours! Seems in your case I was wrong."  
  
"Or maybe you were right." Diana Shrugged "I guess you know what's coming next?"  
  
"Let's do it!" Mulder reached out his hand "Just don't ask me to kiss you.....I really couldn't stomach any more poison this evening."  
  
42 Hegal place began to dissolve into a familiar swirl as Mulder grasped Diana's hand. As the stomach retching volume of colours faded into reality, Mulder could just about distinguish Maggie Scully's parlour.   
  
"Why am I here?" Mulder turned on the fading figure of Diana.  
  
"Trust me, there is a reason. I promise." Diana squeezed his arm. "Just make yourself comfey and all will be revealed." Like the Cheshire Cat, her smile hung in the air long after she disipated.  
  
"Diana, wait up!" Mulder shuffled selfconsciously as he feet sunk into the welcoming carpet. The soft, comforting glow of the christmas tree lights were his only illumination as he made his way to the couch. Under the tree, the evidence of many an hour spent dilegently shopping, tugged at his heart. He took a seat. So this was Christmas present:All souls alive with the spirit of the season.   
  
"What on Earth am I doing here? Here of all places?" Mulder settled uneasily and began his wait.  
  
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A night attired Dana Scully crept down the stairs like a mouse.  
Peering first up the stairwell then into the lounge she breathed a sigh of releif, satisfied that she had disturbed no -one.   
  
"Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house....." Mulder whispered with a smile before holding his breath as her dressing gown brushed past his feet.  
  
In the glow of the tree and the candles scattered around the room, she looked like an enamoured child as she came to rest at the foot of the Douglas Fir. After a quick glance around the room to double check she was alone, Scully reached up and brushed her fingers against the stiff paper skirt of the tree top Angel.  
  
"Angel high upon the tree, grant a little wish for me!"  
  
Scully bowed her head and gave a girlish giggle.   
It had been a long time since she had partaken in this particular family tradition. She fondly recalled Christmas's long since passed, when she and Melissa had come creeping to the tree to have their wishes granted by the angel perched upon it's top.  
  
"I wish you were here for Christmas Mulder." A faint blush crept over Scully's features. "I know it's a selfish wish but I really wanted you here to share this with me. To share my hope and joy for the coming year...to know that cherish your friendship, that I care for you deeply" her voice softened "To know how much I love you...am in love with you."  
  
Mulders heart leapt into his throat. Did he really just hear that?   
  
"Dana, don't forget to light the candle." Maggie Scullys voice was laced with emotion as she entered the room.   
  
"Mom, you scared me." Dana gave a selfconscious smile as her cheeks coloured more obviously. "Come to tell me I'm a bit old for this sort of thing?"  
  
"Nonsense dear, you're never too old. I'm just glad my baby girl still believes in our traditions." Maggie smiled reassuringly "But remember, you must light the candle if you want that wish to come true."   
She brought a small white candle to her daughter and gave her a loving squeeze. Scully took the small column of wax, lit it from a larger version on the mantle above the fireplace then carefully placed it in a small star shaped holder.  
  
"Do wishes ever come true Mom?...I mean I know Missy and I did this every year but I can't remember if it ever worked before"  
  
"You got that Science kit you asked for didn't you. You remember, the one you wished for when you were seven." Maggie laughed "I still remember how you smoked us all out on New Years Eve trying to make a firework."  
  
"But I'm not seven anymore Mom, and this isn't a toy that I'm wishing for. What about the real wishes?"  
  
"Always worked for me." Maggie paused in front of couch perilously close to where Mulder now sat. Panicked by her proximaty he started to shuffle along the cushions, convinced that she was about to sit on him. Maggie cocked her head quizzically then moved instead to the chair.  
"Your dad spent quite a few Christmas's on active duty before you kids were old enough to miss him. I hated it, he hated it, but it was his career and we accepted it. Every one of those times he was gone I lit my candle and wished for his safe return....It never failed."  
  
"But your wishes weren't selfish...mine is."  
  
"My wishes were made for the same selfish reasons that leave you doubting Dana." Maggie chuckled "I wanted the man that I loved at home with me for the holidays...just like you do. That isn't a crime sweetheart....the crime is not believing it could happen."  
  
"Ah, the thorny question of faith?" Dana curled into the opposite corner of the couch to her wide eyed but silently observing partner. "I want to believe mom, I really do...God I sound like that poster on our office wall." she shook her head with an ironic snort.  
"See mom? See what he's done to me...that damn goofy, gorgeous, paranoid, brilliant man that is Mulder. He's has finally got me admitting I want to believe...and he's not even here to see it!"  
  
"He will be. Trust me....trust the Angel."  
  
"I'm all for a bit of devine intervention mom, but I think nothing short of the holy choir indevisible is going to make an impact on the way he was feeling when I left him....I hope our angel has a few pals she can rope into this wish."  
  
"What was the excuse this year?" Maggie's eyes twinkled with amusement. "More little green men to chase in some distant location?"  
  
"No, just one big stupid human." Dana sighed. "He said that he couldn't face meeting up with Bill again."  
  
"Mmm I see." Maggie pursed her lips "And you didn't tell him that Bill and Tara were spending Christmas with her folks this year?"  
  
"I didn't know myself until I got home and picked up my messages."   
  
Mulders ears pricked up at this new piece of information. So Bill wasn't going to be around, well that cast a whole new light on the situation.  
  
"I thought about calling him," Dana studied her hands guiltily "but he got me so mad at him before I left work I decided to let him stew for a while."  
  
"It's not too late, phone him." Maggie nodded in the direction of the phone on the small table next to her daughter. "Don't let your foolish, youthful pride ruin a perfect opportunity..... give the Angel a night off and make your own wish come true."  
  
Apprehensively Scully picked up the reciever and dialled Mulder's number. As the call connected Mulder noticed the look of hope that flared in her eyes. He also noticed how it wavered when his answering machine sprang to life. "Mulder, it's me....If you're there please pick up....Mulder?"   
  
The light in her eyes faded to disappointment as she layed the handset to rest.  
"He's probably gone over to the Lone Gunmen." There was an unnatural lightness to her tone that did nothing to cover her disappointment "I guess I could try again in the morning."  
  
"Don't give up on him Dana. " Maggie's eyes drifted toward the seat on the couch that held the mutely spellbound Mulder."Yes I know. He's irrational, frustrating, emotionally battle scarred and at times so infuriatingly blinkered to what you want to share with him that he makes you want to scream...but so was your father when I met him." Maggie chuckled "Well maybe not quite all those things precisely, but he had some pretty annoying traits non the less....What I'm trying to say Dana is that loving a passionately driven man like Mulder is no walk in the park but the rewards are a world unto themselves."  
  
"I've stayed the course this far," Scully rose to her feet "I'm not about to give in yet mom, but thanks for the pep-talk......Well, I've lit that candle. Made my wish. I guess it's all in the hands of kismet now." Scully wrapped her arms about her mother and planted a big wet kiss on her cheek. "G'night Mom."  
  
"Goodnight dear." With the love that only a mother can feel enveloping her, Maggie watched her daughter climb the stairs. When she was gone Maggie stood and walked to pick up another of the small white candles before approaching the tree-top Angel.  
  
"I know it's been a while my little tinselled friend, but I'm sure you won't mind me making a small wish." Maggie cast her eyes around the room until they reached where Mulder was sitting.   
  
Mulder felt himself stiffen in anticipation of being discovered. Surely, as gifted with an almost unnatural perception as the Scully women seemed to be, the matriachal figure currently gazing at him couldn't be aware of his unearthly presence:Could she?  
  
"My wish for you Fox Mulder, is that you find what you need to give your restless soul the peace it needs. The courage to allow your heart to be free and the good old- fashioned common sense to realise that my daughter is in love with you." Maggie lit the candle, placed it alongside Dana's then moved to the door. "Oh one more thing Fox..."  
  
Mulders head snapped round so quickly it nearly cut off his air supply. Maggie lingered in the door way for just a second as their eyes met. Mulder felt his stomach clench. Oh God, she could see him!   
  
"I expect to see you at my dining table tomorrow young man!" The wink she gave before she departed was almost conspiritorial "Merry Christmas Fox."  
  
******************************************************  
  
That was just too surreal! Mulder braced his hands against the arms of the couch, pushing himself up onto adrenaline shakey legs. The warm sensation that had ignited in his chest the moment Scully had professed her feelings for him, had now reached the proportions of a backdraft. Scully loves me!...is in love with me! He skittered joyfully across the carpet as he found his feet. But how had Maggie known he was there? Oh to hell with the logistics...Scully loves me!   
  
One last white candle remained unlit on the mantle as Mulder leant giddily against it. Would the Christmas Angel allow him a wish? His fingers began to reach for it.  
  
"Mulder. Mulder it's time to return." Even the softness of the voice couldn't disguise Diana's detatchment.  
  
"I want to make a wish." Mulder rounded on the means of his transportation. "C'mon Diana...as a friend....as a former lover... as my ex-wife, would you deny me that?"  
  
"I have no say in the matter."  
  
"Then I guess it's okay." He reached for the stick of wax only to watch down-hearted as his fingers slipped like mist over it's shape. His gaze cast down, the realisation of his ethereal limits dawned. Maggie Scully's lounge became a swirling cloud of what was now and yet was not and Mulder felt his butt hit the battered leather couch in his apartment with a thud.  
  
"Now that was just downright spitefull Diana!" Mulder could barely disguise his displeasure.  
  
"I told you, it was time to return." Diana folded her arms "I only accompany time I don't control it."  
  
"Why was Maggie able to see me?"  
  
"The enlightened are blessed with such perception Mulder." Diana's hard features softened "The real question is, what were you able to see?"  
  
Mulder pondered the question. He'd been witness to his Partners declaration of her love for him.....but his meticulously built defenses still wouldn't let him trust his vision. "Scully said she loved me."  
  
"You seem suprised?" Diana laughed "You're an easy person to love Mulder...despite all your many faults.  
Scully's a strong, smart woman and she understands you better than you understand yourself. What drives you, what tortures you and what you need to overcome all the demons in your life and because of that, not despite it Mulder, but because of that, she loves you. How do you feel about her?"  
  
"I love her. Oh God you have no idea how much...have for a long time." Was that a blush that coloured his confession?  
  
"And yet you still continue to build up the walls between you!"  
  
"She deserves more than I can give her. It would be too dangerous to let her know how I felt...you know what we're up against Diana, Jeez, you were a part of all that. If they got an inkling of what she means to me..."   
  
"They'd do what? Take her from you? Take you from her?  
Experiment on you both? Mulder wake up and smell the coffee, it's too late. They've done it all already!" Diana shook her head as she stood." Take a chance. Defy the bastards....Maybe it's time to let go your conscious self and act on instinct." She strolled to toward the door "Well, my time's up I'm afraid. Your last guide for the night should be along shortly, take heed of what you see and good luck."  
  
"Thanks Diana...oh I do have one last question. Our Marriage? Was it all a set up....I mean did you marry me because you loved me or because you were told too?"  
  
Diana's features broke into sorrowfull smile "A bit of both...yes our marriage was planned but I never let *them* know that by the time the deed was done I'd fallen for you hook, line and sinker."  
  
"But you filed for divorce...went to Europe...if you loved me that much why do those things?"  
  
"Sometimes if you love something you have to let it go..."  
Diana kissed her palm and blew it across the room to him  
"Remember, take heed Fox and good luck."  
  
  
Once more the tv flared and Diana was gone. Mulder stared off into the void of static and contemplated all that he had been shown. Two down and one to go he thought soberly.  
  
  
Part three concluded......................  
  
********************************************************  
  
  
  
  



	4. Default Chapter Title

title: Bah Humbug! pt 4  
Author: Jen the Genie  
Disclaimer/notes: see pt 1  
  
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Apartment 42 Hegal Place  
Dec 24th 11:30pm Approx  
  
The clock on the video read 11.30pm as Mulder fought to grasp some thread of reality in his currently surreal situation. Only one hour of his pityfully sad existance had passed and already he felt like he'd experienced several life times.   
  
One more visit to come! One more visit to come! The words repeated in his head like a mantra. A mantra that held the key to his tenious grip on sanity he thought wryly. The mocking little demon of his self-loathing had already made it's presence felt with a strong vocal insinuation that he could have spared this ordeal, if only he'd had the good sense and courage to accept Scully's offer of a family christmas. *Too late dick brain!* The demon's caustic tone cut across the comfort of his mantra.  
  
"So how's it going Mulder?" The condescending tone of Krycek cut across the Demon's tormenting words."Suitably enlightened yet?".   
  
Mulder jumped."You're not the spirit of Christmas Future." His eyes focussed on the pile of chains still embellishing Krycek's feet.  
  
"I am tonight Mulder. He's phoned in sick, Emphysema I think." Alex made a sneaky attempt at grabbing the bottle of Tequila still resting, untouched since his last visit, on the low table. His Ghostly fingers passed through the bottle neck three times before he gave up. "Oh man! Don't you just hate it when that happens?"  
  
"So you're moon-lighting then?" Mulder found himself satisfyingly amused by the Russian's frustration. "Hope the union don't find out....I assume there is a Spirit Union?"  
  
"Oh yeah, there's a Union alright. But I have it written in my contract that I must be available to cover any shortfall of personnel." Krycek shrugged "Still, can't complain. I'm on time and half for this shift, double time if we get beyond midnight and into actual *Chrimbo*, plus I get a day off in lieu."   
  
"Nice work if you can get it. Even the Bureau only pays time and half max." Even as insane as the feeling was, Mulder felt a twinge of envy. "Aren't you supposed to have a long black cloak and a scythe?"  
  
"I only get the job, not the uniform...besides Black is just so damn depressing....You ready to go?  
  
"As ready as I'll ever be." Mulder stood up and extended his hand.  
  
"Over my dead body!" Alex stepped back and held his hands up. "Look Mulder, I like you an' all, but there's no way in hell I'm holding your hand!"  
  
"You are a dead body." Mulder pointed out dryly "So how do we do this?"  
  
"You're gonna love this pal!" Krycek grinned evilly.  
"Click your heels together three times and repeat after me, *There's no brand like Morleys*" He watched delighted as Mulder's face fell. "Bet you're real glad I showed up now, aren't you?"  
  
With gritted teeth, narrowed eyes and barely able to contain the sudden impulse to wipe the smug countenance off Krycek's face, Mulder complied, somewhat reluctantly, with the instructions. This time instead of the stomach churning swirl of colours, it was a puff of dense acrid smoke and a strong smell of sulphur that enveloped the pair.  
  
As they emmerged, coughing and spluttering on the other side Alex remarked "Remind me to have a word with Christmas Future when we get back....that can't be good for his chest!"  
  
"You really are all heart aren't you?" Mulder wiped his streaming eyes on his sleeve "Let the old bastard do it his way...it might prove fatal with any luck."  
  
"Oh and a Merry Christmas to you as well!" Krycek gathered up his coil of chains and began to march into the darkness "Well come on then, lets get this show on the road."  
  
Mulder took a long, hard look around. It was a parking lot. An underground parking lot if he wasn't mistaken.  
He couldn't make out where. Parking lot's were somewhat generic at the best of times and this appeared no different from countless others he'd encountered over the years.  
  
"Mulder will you get a move on!" Krycek was waiting at a nearby elevator. "If you don't get your ass over here PDQ, you'll miss the big show." He pulled a face. "If that happens then I'll have to do a rewind and if I have to do a rewind then when I get back I'll have to fill out a CC 1013 to explain why I had to do a rewind, etc, etc, etc.....I'm really not in the mood for red tape."  
  
"But think of the overtime?"  
  
"Overtime, smovertime! I've got plans for the rest of my holiday....got myself a red hot date with Christmas past...wouldn't want to let her down." He waggled his eyebrows suggestively "Y'know what I mean?"  
  
"You've got a date with Phoebe?" Mulder, although suprised, couldn't help thinking how fitting a pair they made.  
  
"Ah, but you forget. To you she's Phoebe Green, to me she's Natalya Dubrevnikov. A voluptuous eighteen year old prostitute and the only Christmas present I actually enjoyed!" Krycek guffawed loudly "Judging by the look on your face Mulder, perhaps I should explain that I was nearly fourteen at the time and my parents were very liberal....."  
  
"That was more information than I actually needed, but thanks for sharing." Mulder couldn't hide his revulsion at the mental images foisted upon him. He was gratefull for the sudden arrival of the elevator car and stepped inside "Which floor?"  
  
"Pick a button, any button. You're alright it's programmed for where you need to go." Krycek didn't move to join him. "I won't come with you....actually I can't come with you, but you have fun now Mulder...don't forget to write." The doors slid shut and the tremble of gears in motion carried Mulder upward.  
  
"Scully if you can hear me at all, I'm really sorry I ticked you off!" It was the prayer of the damned and he knew it but it was the only thing he could think to do.  
  
As the elevator ground to a shuddering halt Mulder took a deep breath and braced himself. Christmas Future. Well that was an unknown quantity wasn't it? So far on his travels he'd been both emotionally devastated, joyously uplifted then let down once again...what more could the future possibly hold? His edetic memory scanned the original Dickensian text in his mental pending-tray for a quick reference. His experiences so far hadn't exactly conformed to the standard had they! Was he was about get two options? he noted wryly. With Krycek at the helm it was anyone's guess.   
  
  
The doors slid apart with a *whoosh* and Mulder found himself more than a little bemused as the basement of the Hoover Building came into view. As casually as his adrenaline wracked legs would carry him, he made his way to his office door and pushed it open. When nothing sinister leapt out at him, he proceeded toward the blinking screen of his computer monitor and took a seat.  
  
"You've got mail!" His brow furrowed as he read the screen. "Hmmm, better see what it is then."   
  
He quickly logged in then hit the retrieve button. There was a whirring within as the requested mail was recalled and the real-time player engaged. Mulder leaned back in his chair, tossing his feet up casually on the desk. If I'd known, I'd have brought pop-corn he mused as the screen was suddenly filled with a silent moving image.  
  
The camera work was a bit shakey, the focus a little blurred, but Mulder had a wealth of experience in negotiating the unique pictorial essence of home video. It didn't take him too long to realise that the two figures wrapped in the almost melt-down inducing lip tango were a man and a woman: He and Scully to be precise.  
  
He almost uptipped the chair in his haste to get nearer the screen. With a pounding heart he watched as the kiss continued. Thirty seconds passed...forty seconds. His ears were ringing in oxygen deprived empathy when Scully and his future self came up for air. Wow! It had never occurred to him that their lung capacity was as good as that!   
  
His future self was casually dressed in a dark blue turtleneck and jeans, whilst Scully appeared to wearing  
something long, pale and flowing. he couldn't distinguish details as the camera person chose that moment to adjust the focus. The camera angle began to shift, tracking backward to enlarge the shot. Without the accompaniment of sound, the circumstances of the view were a bit difficult to discern, that was until a christmas tree came into frame. He watched entranced as a blushing Scully pushed her hair back from her face, her dainty finger wagging at the camera as if to scold. His future self gave a self conscious shrug and ran a hand through his own hair in a mirror action as Scully clapped her hands and dived beneath the tree, emmerging momentarily with a small but beautifully wrapped gift.  
  
Mulder was on the verge of thumping the screen, his disappointment tangible, when the image before him started to fade out. His interest was piqued to the point of bursting. He wanted to see more. How was he supposed to deduce how far into the future this was with so little information? He toyed with idea of calling on Krycek to fill in missing data but figured even if it was within his guides' capability to do so, he had little doubt the double-crossing rat would love to refuse.   
  
He was about to set the virtual video clip to rewind when another sprang to life. Walls painted generously in yellow and white slipped easily into focus. Walls painted in yellow and white and scattered with bouncing bunnies, pert lambs and fluffy orange ducks.   
  
Mulder's eyebrows drew together to form a large caterpillar of quizzical perplexity.  
  
The camera panned across the room, dodging a cloud of bright, shiny balloons of congratulation tied to the rail of a hospital bed, not stopping until it came to rest on a male figure seated in a chair. Mulder's heart stopped in it's tracks. The Figure looked full into the camera lens with eyes as wide and disbeliving as the one's veiwing the screen. Unmistakeable, rich hazel eyes that were brimming with joyfull tears. Tears that spilled unstoppable from those eyes as they gazed once again on the tiny sleeping bundle nestled in hesitent, yet protective arms.  
  
The figure of a tired but blissfully happy Scully settled herself next to his twin on the screen. Glowing with the radiance of a classically painted Madonna, she leant her head onto his shoulder, her slim hand reaching to wipe away a stray tear. His twin gave a soppy heart bursting grin and turned, pressing his lips against her hair before passing the sleeping bundle to her. Scooping it into her arms, Scully took the baby and snuggled it carefully to her breast.  
  
"OH MY GOD!" Mulders voice gave life to words that he could only recall thinking. "Oh my God." This was a joke surely? A bitter, sadistic Joke! A christmas future that could never be, given what he knew. A twist of Machiavellian cunning, perpetrated, no doubt by his night's tormentors, just to add insult to injury.  
Again the vision ended as abruptly as it had started leaving Mulder gaping at a blank screen.  
  
Within the blink of an eye he was back in his apartment, slumped on his battered leather couch. The debris of bottles and empty Nacho packets strewn across the table and the hiss of the static spangled screen an acute reminder of his evenings lonely beginnings.  
  
"That was quick!" Alex was sat in the chair again, his transparent hands carefully wrapped around a ghostly bottle of Vodka. "See anything you liked?"  
  
"Huh!" Mulder was still lost in the virtual video. He and Scully? That he could comprehand. That was the future he always secretly dreamed of. But he and Scully and a baby? That must be a trick, it had to be. Even in the realms of the extreme possibilities that fueled his brain, he knew that was a non starter. A void began to open up within his heart as he realised this was a future conjured more from pipe dreams and futile wishes than hope. A future that had no basis in fact and was therefore redundant   
  
"It must have been good to rob you of words." Krycek took a long swig from the bottle, pulled out a small hour glass from his pocket and checked it. "Well I must say it's been a blast Mulder, but I've gotta dash!"  
  
"Uh...yeah...whatever." Mulder still couldn't wrap his brain around his enlightenment. As what he'd been shown couldn't possibly come to being, could it be an indication he was beyond the future. Beyond time itself.  
  
"What, no questions about the downside?" Krycek drained his vodka, chrushing the empty bottle to a mere stain of stardust that he proceeded to brush from his palms.  
  
Mulder faced his tormentor with a cold smile "Now let me see, what did Dickens predict for scrooge....a vision of his own headstone? The prospect of a death un-mourned... I'm dead aren't I?" He took up the half empty Tequila bottle from the table and made a quick assessment his possible blood/alcohol level. "I drank myself quietely into oblivion this evening and died from alcoholic poisoning didn't I? This isn't a dream, this is a quick tour of all the screw ups of my romantic life so that when I reach the bowels of hell or wherever I'm heading, it'll seem like a walk in the park in comparison? Didn't you say that you'd meet me on the flipside.....C'mon help me out here Alex, am I even close?"  
  
"Close?" Alex held his sides in laughter induced pain.  
"Close? Mulder you're so far out of the wood you can't even see the trees anymore!"  
  
"But the future I saw couldn't possible happen...."  
  
"The future is what it wants to be...I can't tell you whether it's accurate or not."  
  
"But I saw Scully with a baby!" Frustrated, Mulder pushed his head into his hands and rubbed his temples "I was there, I was holding it and weeping....Krycek you know as well as I that she can't...besides we haven't even kissed, yet alone.....well you know what I mean." Mulder shook his head.  
  
"You're right, you haven't and she can't. Not here in the present anyway. But that was the future Mulder...in the future anything is possible. I thought you of all people would be able to make that leap! Hard facts have never stopped you before. Maybe it was adopted? Did you think of that!...or maybe the miracle of modern science finally came up trumps for the pair of you."  
  
"So the baby was...is mine?"  
  
"I can't tell you that for certain either, ....What I can tell you Mulder, with concrete certainty, is that the downside of your future is here in this room." Alex cast his eyes around his cheerless, empty surroundings and waived his hands "Is that what you want? A future filled with warped paranoia, mindless tv, tacky porn vidoes and the occasional bit of self induced relief courtesy of a dis-embodied voice at the other end of an 0900 number?"  
  
"No, but..."  
  
"What I'm saying Mulder, is if that's the future you really want then you've got to make a few choices." Krycek grinned "If you really want to get to the Emerald City then you're gonna have to step on a few yellow bricks!..... still think this is an alcohol induced, Dickensian inspired guilt trip?"  
  
"Without a doubt!" Suddenly Mulder felt very, very drunk.  
  
"Figured as much." The Russian delved into his pocket  
and pulled out a small, square, untidyly wrapped parcel and tossed it over. "Then you might just need this in the morning......" As the melodic strains of *Somewhere over the Rainbow* began to chorus around the room, the figure of Alex Krycek blinked into nothingness.  
  
With hazy vision Mulder looked down at the package, raised his eyebrow quizically and fought to contain a disbelieving snort . A gift from Krycek? Well that proved his point precisely. A sudden thought struck him...what if this was the final twist of ironic fate? If everything he'd been shown this evening couldn't reduce him to the required suicidal wreck, maybe who ever had instigated this needed to make absolutely sure he never awoke? Bringing the gift to his ear he listened carefully for any signs of ticking, then shook it just to be certain. When it remained silent his fingers edged under the wrapping and peeled it back a little. As the paper fell away Mulder couldn't supress a chuckle as he stared down at the four inch square frame made of wood and glass.  
  
*IN CASE OF HANGOVER - BREAK GLASS* The thick black lettering leapt off the shiny red cardboard above a   
couple of large Aspirin.  
  
The chuckle quickly gave way to a manic burst of laughter as he threw back his head. The laughter continued until his ribs ached and he was barely able to draw breath. Gasping and wiping his eyes to blot the tears of mirth, Mulder took another look at the gift then started to laugh again. He was still laughing when the Tequila finally overtook him and he passed out.  
  
*******************************************************  
  
The pealing of church bells awoke Mulder. As his consciousness clawed it's way through his cotton candy brain and a white tipped, high rolling wave of nauseau took possesion of his stomach, it felt for all the world as if the bells were hanging somewhere inside the apartment and not the two miles he actually lived from the nearest church.   
  
He groaned and attempted to sit up. Even the slightest motion caused his world to tip and roll on it's axis. Reflexively he clapped his hand over his bone dry, yet rapidly salivating mouth, not convinced it would prevent the upcoming purge of vomit, but prepared at least to try. He lay back down, shifting as carefully as he dared to relieve the pins and needles dancing through his limbs and tried to force his eyes open.  
  
"Must get up...." Even barely mumbled, the words caused his stomach to free-fall and threaten . Concentrating his effort he tried again.   
  
"must get up and get some Coffee" Grabbing his nauseau by the metaphorical scruff of it's neck, he took a deep breath and swung his legs onto the floor. As they touched down on the rug something tumbled from his lap and fell with glass splintering crash. Mulder blinked curiously as he eyed the shattered object. Wasn't that the gift he'd received from krycek last night? Either he was still drunk and dreaming, or somewhere in the night he'd finally opened that last paper thin door between his normally paranoid psyche and total delusional insanity and tripped gaily through it. Reaching down, his fingers closed around the wooden frame and lifted it into his feild of fuzzy vision. Two large round pills peeled off the card and rolled into his palm.  
  
"Well I'll be damned..." A disbelieving smile tugged at his lips. Yes he had been drunk last night. His current physical state was a sorry and painful testimony to that, but was this the evidence of something far more fantastical? Still absently pondering the truth he popped the tablets onto his tongue, washing them down with a quick gulp of stale, flat beer from a nearby bottle. More bells began to go off in his head as his brain lit up quicker than a pin-ball machine on full tilt.  
  
"Remember Mulder, if you want to get to the Emerald City then you're gonna have to step on a few yellow bricks!"   
  
Krycek's dis-embodied words floated over a quick techniclour replay of the future he'd be shown, as the tablets travelled to the depths of his protesting stomach. Mulder closed his eyes, pushed his head into his hands and waited for the inevitable urge to pray to the porcelain deity...it didn't come. The medication hit his stomach wall and exploded like an internal nuclear device and still it didn't come. Unbelievably he began to feel better. In fact, the longer he sat there the better he began to feel. As the light of the explosion meandered its way into every nook and cranny of his being he felt strangely uplifted. A hereto unknown feeling of joy and hope took hold of his soul and began to dance with it. Mulder smiled, then chuckled then threw back his head and began to laugh.  
  
"I never thought I'd say this, mercenary, double crossing litte rat-fink, but I think I finally get it!"  
  
He leapt to his feet, the shadow of his disbelieving former self cast abuptly to one side. "Scully, I figured it out!" his grin beamed. "Scully? Oh wow I nearly forgot...I have to get to Scully!" With the countenance of a man possessed he dashed to the bathroom.   
  
  
With a new found zest for the season and beyond, he showered then dived into his closet. After much muttering, considering and tossing of garments, his hands closed on what he was hunting for: A dark Blue Turtleneck sweater. He brandished it triumphantly as he emmerged and pulled in on. The jeans were easy to find after that and as he ran comb through his damp hair and studied himself in the mirror he couldn't help but  
smile. The whole ensemble was just as he's seen in the blurry variation of his future. Was he tempting fate or just giving it hand? The latter he decided, as he grabbed his jacket off the peg and opened the door.  
With a spring in his step and whistling *Were off to see the Wizard* he waltzed toward the day.  
  
******************************************************  
  
He was approaching Maggie's neat suburban house when the first nugget of classic Mulder self doubt encroached on his good humour. What if the events of the previous night had been a guilt ridden dream? He shook himself free of the thought. After last night he sorely wanted to believe otherwise, but so what if it were he decided. He'd been invited for Christmas and despite his rather rude refusal there was still time to make amends. If the future he'd seen wasn't ready to present its-self then he could still enjoy the sparkling company of two lovely woman.  
  
He made as far as the drive when the second nugget hit him. If it had been dream, then Bill Scully could quite well be insitue. He took that one and kicked it into touch. Scully was right why should he care what *big brother* thought of him. After all the guy wasn't exactly an ogre...he was just doing what Mulder had done when Samantha was still around. He trying to protect his little sister from the uncertainties of the world. Mulder had failed for a thousand or more reasons way beyond his adolescent control, and although the guilt of that would always colour his life he couldn't hate Bill for trying to do the same. If, and Mulder made a leap of renewed faith and assumed it was a pretty big *if* at this point. If Bill were actually here he would just have to prove his fears unfounded. Taking a deep breath he strode up the yellow Roman brick path and knocked of the dark green door.  
  
  
"Mulder?" Scully's eyes were still sleepy and her hair had that wonderfully unstructured just-fell-out-of-bed  
look but it took Mulder's breath away all the same.  
  
"Mulder,what are you doing here? it's not even 8am...  
Is something wrong?" She stifled a yawn as she pulled her pale yellow robe a bit tighter.  
  
"I... umm...well...err.. you did say...what I mean is.." The words wouldn't come and he was reduced to scuffing the toe of his boot against the door mat like a guilty child as he frantically tried to put a coherant sentence together.  
  
"Mulder you're making no sense...as usual." She stood back and waived him in with another sleepy yawn. "Come in before you freeze us both...I'll get us some Coffee and then you can explain yourself." Leaving him to close the door Scully padded bare-foot toward the kitchen.  
  
Mulder shut the door and walked tentatively toward the parlour. If his future was going to start here and now, then he knew exactly where to look for confirmation. He crossed to the mantle chewing his lip nervously. As the two star-shaped holders caught his attention his heart leapt. They *were* there! He reached and freed the one he'd seen Scully use last night from the pool of melted wax that covered it and held it in his hand. He was gazing and stroking it still, when Scully appeared from the kitchen with the Coffee.  
  
"Now what was so important that you had to race around here at the crack of dawn?...it had better not be an xfile....it's the holidays, remember?" She cocked her head on one side, raising her eyebrow in her usual way when she caught sight of what he doing "It's a candle holder Mulder...you put candles in it!"  
  
"And wishes.." he whispered to himself as he gave her sheepish smile. "Not it's not an Xfile Scully....I came to say I'm sorry. I'm sorry we had words, I'm sorry I upset you. I'm sorry if I ruined your evening..Hell, I've probably ruined your whole Christmas and not for the first time I'll bet... " He ran out of apologies and breath almost in tandem and hung his head. "I guess I'm just one sorry son-of-a-bitch all round really."  
  
"I see." Scully sipped her Coffee and regarded him earnestly. "Then I guess I should really accept your apologies...it being the season of Peace and Goodwill an' all."  
  
"It's not compulsory but it would be rather nice..." His face slipped into his trademark *puppy dog* look before he realised he was doing it. "I know I'm pushing my luck  
but is the invitation to join you still open?"  
  
"Hmmm I don't know..." A teasing twinkle lit Scully's eyes "Maybe I should go and wake Bill and see what he thinks." Without waiting for his reply she put down her mug and went to move toward the door.  
  
"Wouldn't it be easier to use this?" Pocketing the candle holder still in his hand, Mulder picked up the phone and with an expression of total innocence, held it out to her. A look of pure bewilderment crossed Scully's face as she took it from him.  
  
"I'm not sure he's going to be best pleased though." Mulder looked at his watch and did a quick mental calculation "I mean it's not even 3am in San Diego yet, is it?"  
  
Scully paled visibly then dropped, slack-jawed onto the nearest chair. How had he known that? A jumble of thoughts crowded her mind and she rifled through them until she fell upon the capabilities of the Lone Gunmen. That fired a spark of temper which in turn lit the fuse of fury.  
  
"How did you know.....You tapped into my phone!" The words were sharp and filled with hot disbelief. "You went around to the boys last night and got them to access my answer machine!..."   
  
Mulder stepped back."WHAT?" This certainly wasn't reaction he had anticipated. Maybe it hadn't been a good idea to parade his new found knowledge in the face of her understandable ignorance. " No Scully, no....I didn't..I wouldn't...." He stuttered.  
  
"I phoned your place last night, you were out....I've seen you pull some stunts in your time Mulder but I really didn't think you would stoop this low...." Throwing her hands up wildly, she jumped to her feet and began to pace the floor in front of him. "How could you?"  
  
"I didn't, I swear!...look Scully, you've got this all wrong...let me explain." He words had no immediate impact her pacing and Mulder felt a sudden surge of panic. Had he really had tempted fate just a little bit too much this time? How was he going to explain all this without sounding like a raving basket-case? Come to think of it, how did he ever explain his wild theories and notions without sounding as such?   
  
Throwing caution to the wind he made a grab for his pacing partner, scooping her into his arms and depositing her, wide-eyed, onto the couch.  
"Sit there, be quiet and listen to me for minute will you woman."   
  
Scully narrowed her eyes and although she opened her mouth to protest, she quickly closed it again then folded her arms expectantly.  
  
"Thank you. Now if you can stay like that for a couple of minutes I might be able to explain." It was now Mulder's turn to pace the floor,  
"You were right Scully. You were right when you said that I buried myself in my work. You were right when you said that it was an excuse to avoid the real world....last night I went home feeling thoroughly sorry for myself, wanting badly to get drunk but thinking about you said about Scrooge finally figuring it out.   
Now I know you're not going to believe this...God know's I'm having a hard enough time with it myself, but I had a few visitors last night Scully and they weren't the usual kind."  
  
Scully's eye's rolled heavenward but, to her credit, she didn't say a word. Mulder noted her expression and gave a small shrug. Here goes nothing, he thought as he planted himself next to his partner on the couch and took a deep breath.   
  
He decided to start slowly, giving a blow by blow account of his encounters first with Krycek, then with Phoebe. Wide eyed and attentive Scully had the good grace not to laugh as the story spilled from his lips, althoughhe could see she was sorely tempted. Even when he got to the real gut wrenching parts and reached for her hand, she merely shrugged and nodded.   
  
Spurred on by this action alone, he continued. Through into Christmas present and the visit of Diana. Only when he reached the part where he had witnessed her private wish did his tale start to falter. When Scully caught his attention in askance, he quickly chose to bypass that particular moment and carried on to his second encounter with krycek calling a halt only when he reached Christmas future.  
  
The silence in the room was almost palpable as Scully took the tale he'd just spun and digested it. Mulder chose to stare at the floor. Part of him was waiting for her to explode. Laid out in black and white like that  
the story read like something concocted by a mad fanfiction writer. The other part, the hopefull part  
wanted her to treat it as just another one of his fancifull but nearly always right theories. It took several more agonising minutes before Scully sighed thoughtfully then spoke.  
  
"Well Mulder, what can I say? That's a good one even by your standards." she pulled her hand free of his and stood up. "Even if I disregard your admitted intake of alcohol and all the laws of physics....what I would have most trouble with is that you would actually trust all the people you said you met last night....I mean Phoebe Green? Diana Fowley? Krycek!!"  
  
"I know..I know...so you don't believe me then?" Mulder didn't look up but harboured a vain hope she did.  
  
"Don't believe you? Of course I don't believe you!" The explosion finally came. "Not only was that the biggest load of alcohol fuelled, guilt ridden, Freudian BS I've ever had the misfortune to come across...but coming from you?...Well...well that's just insulting."  
  
Her words were like a knife to his heart but he couldn't blame her. "I guess there's nothing more to say then.." He got to his feet and made his way painfully to the doorway. "I'm sorry. I never meant to insult your intelligence Scully...I'd never do anything to hurt you."  
  
"If you really mean that then tell me the truth Mulder!"  
Scully's tone softened. "How did you know that Bill was in San Diego?"  
  
"I told you. I was here. I saw." as he pushed his hands into his jacket pockets, his fingers closed around the candle holder that stood on the mantle. As a light bulb came on dimly in his head, he withdrew the star and held it out. "Scully, I swear on your mothers life that I sat on that couch last night and watched you light small white candle in this holder and ask that Angel up there to grant you a wish..." His eyes locked onto hers. "I know it sounds crazy, but it's true."  
  
Not for the first time that morning Scully paled.   
  
"Angel high upon the tree grant a little wish for me.."  
He moved back to her, reciting her wish chapter and verse and handed her the star. "Look me in the eye and tell me I'm liar." he challenged softly as he cupped her cheek to keep her eyes with his. "Look me in the eye Scully, look me in the eye and tell me I'm insane....that I didn't hear you say you loved me as much as I love you."  
  
Scully began to tremble as she closed her eyes. "I...I can't." she leant into his hand and he felt a tiny tear against his palm "I can't Mulder....I'm so sorry..this is so insane...?"  
  
Mulder rested his forhead against hers and drew her closer. " Hey,it's okay. I'm not sure I would have believed me either." He gave her a squeeze "but please believe that I love you Scully...am in love with you and have been for a very long time." He lowered his head kissing the trail of tears that had sprung from her still closed eyes. Scully wrapped her arms around him and brought her lips to his.  
  
"I love you too Mulder...have down for a long time."  
  
"Then I guess this is okay then." He brushed his lips against hers.  
  
"Oh yes!" Any further words redundant Scully fastened her lips on his fervently. The kiss became more passionate with each passing second. Their bodies melded together as their mouthes tangoed effortlessly. Finger wound into hair, tongues duelled, senses reeled and still the kiss continued. Thirty seconds passed...forty seconds...   
  
From the stairwell an unseem Maggie Scully watched  
and smiled. Dana's wish had been granted, as she knew it would be, even if it were by more unorthodox methods than a battered Tree top Angel. Glancing down at the new Cam-corder in her palm an idea struck. The young couple were too engrossed to notice as she snuck into the room to capture the embrace for posterity.  
  
Mulder and Scully came up for air just in time to see a beaming Maggie as she filmed the event.   
  
"Aww Gee!" Blushing furiously Scully swept her hair back and wagged a mock-scolding finger at the lens. "Mom that's really not fair."  
  
"I thought you might like this for the record." Maggie backed up and adjusted the angle "I know how meticulous you FBI agents are about evidence.....Dana honey, didn't you have a little something under the tree for Fox?"  
  
Mulder gave a little self conscious shrug and ran his hand through his own hair as Scully gave a squeel, clapped her hands and dived beneath the branches.  
When she emmerged she thrust a small but beautifully  
wrapped parcel into his hands then peeped at him from under a stray lock of hair that had fallen back over her face. "It's not much...." she started, her fingers hovering, itching to help him unwrap it. "I hope you don't mind..."  
  
Mulder stripped away the wrapping and the thick layers  
of tissue then starred totally gob-smacked at the small  
pewter casket in his palm. "Mind?" He gulped down the tears of emotion that threatened to engulf him. "Scully it's beautiful...I don't know what to say..."  
  
"It's pandora's box." she whispered softly as she slid up close to him, her fingers straying to the gift. "When I saw it I just knew that it was the ideal gift....I mean Mulder, after all we've seen unleashed in the world whilst working together what better to sum it all up than this?" She took his finger and lifted the lid "See...it even has the one thing left in it I know you need most in this life:Hope."  
  
All the gulping in the world couldn't stop the tears in Mulder's eyes this time. "Thank you Scully." his words were hoarse "Thank you but I've got the thing I really needed to give me hope...I've got you." He swooped and captured her lips with another searing kiss.  
  
Maggie sighed nostalgically, turned off the cam-corder  
and side stepped the lovestruck pair. As their kiss carried then into an unseen, private realm she fished into her pocket and withdrew the very last small white candle that she possessed and approached the tree top Angel.  
  
"Angel high upon the tree, grant a little wish for me."  
The Ghostly form of Christmas future sidled up, unseen by all, and with a quick wink at oblivious Maggie asked.  
  
"Wishing for the opportunity to knit baby bootee's Mrs Scully?" He took a quick drag on the cigarette in his wizened hand.  
"I think I can arrange that!"  
  
The candle fizzled into flame startling the unsuspecting woman.  
Bemused, Maggie shook her head and placed the candle in the holder on the mantle  
  
  
  
Fin  
******************************************************  
Was it too far out of left feild? Did I screw with the  
concept a bit too much? The fact that you're still here, reading this, must indicate you thought it was worth sticking with it to the end....Right?  
  
Whatever your thoughts I'd love to know....I'll even accept flames gratefully at this point as my heating is   
Kaput and My lamp is freezing.....  
  
Until then I think I'll go and have a long lie down.  
If anyone wants me....well, you know the drill!  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



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